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What I Need

September 10, 2014

What I need is fairly simple.

In college I learned about Maslow’s Hierachy of Needs.  It made sense to me then.  It still makes sense to me now.  Basic needs are very simple and build on lower based needs.  At the base are biological needs and at the top are more complex needs that need the lower needs met before they can me met.

As shown in the chart below, from bottom to top, a person’s needs are:

maslow

1. Physiological/Biological needs – air, food, drink, shelter, warmth, sex, sleep.

2. Safety needs – protection from elements, security, order, law, stability, freedom from fear.

3. Social needs – friendship, intimacy, affection, love, belonging, understanding – from work group, family, friends, romantic relationships.

4. Esteem needs – achievement, mastery, independence, status, dominance, prestige, self-respect, respect from others.

5. Self-Actualization needs – realizing personal potential, self-fulfillment, seeking personal growth and peak experiences.

 

So why is it so %#@& hard to get my needs met?

I need employment and income to meet basic needs.  I need human care and concern.   I need medical care access.  I need a home or at least a modest amount of personal space.  I need privacy.  I need kindness.   I need affection.  I need understanding.

I just need to go home to my personal space at the end of the work day and be with those who I love and know they are OK so I can get the sleep I need.

Is that so much to ask?

But this world has stripped me of my job, my home, my spouse, my children, and kicked me to the curb.

And those I trusted most have betrayed and abandoned me.

My government has stripped me of my spouse, my home and my full rights to children in a wicked game of ‘chicken’ (no-fault divorce) where to maintain your rights you would go bankrupt and lose your ability to meet your own needs and the needs of the ones you love most.

I can get those things that I need, but not without significant obstacles.

My church who I put the keys to my eternal fate in, has put me on hold while they grind out the sordid details of my failed marriage before granting an annulment before I can be allowed to remarry and get basic human needs met and rebuild a good life.

It seems as though every way I turn I am frustrated in recovering from a horrible set of circumstances that I did not create other than trying to be loving and care for the ones I love and have their needs met too.

And I’m not the only one frustrated in attempts to get my basic needs met.  I see so many others struggling out there to find work, to juggle life’s demands, and to get what they need.  Maybe you are too.

At least the air we need is still free, even if the quality of it is foul or polluted, or the messages that waft through it are harmful or hurtful.

“Sometimes, all I need is the air that I breathe and to love you.”

– The Hollies; Songwriters:  Albert Hammond and Mike Hazlewood

So, if you can help me in some way to meet any of my needs, please let me know.  I would appreciate it.

But if you’re intent like so many others to frustrate my basic human needs, or to make me feel bad, please steer clear.  I would appreciate that too.

Thank you.

 

And ‘No, I don’t need to clean my room’.  But if you need me to clean my room, I will try to do it again to your satisfaction, out of love for you, and in an effort to find some sense of peace in my own limited personal space and difficult circumstances.  By the way, “Good morning!”

 

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